Thursday, May 13, 2010

I sit here.

Sometimes I overthink my existence. This mainly takes place when I'm attempting to fall asleep. My mind likes to kick into overdrive at the worst times. This is something I wrote when i was younger about that.

I sit here with an unlit cigarette in my mouth. The butt dangles from the bottom of my lip while I try to impress my friends that so inadequately cant do the same trick. This is a trademark smokers move, but what is really happening inside the smokers mind. Things are starting to form. New worlds are being fashioned like a second creation. I like to think of it as motionless time travel. The brain acts as the machine running the show. It makes numerous stops over a short period of time. Some people would consider this daydreaming, but to me its not. The reality is that all the stops made on this trip will happen in the future. Every passing moment is a new adventure that can only be stopped through pure will power, sometimes that's not even enough to stop the furious mechanism. The couch where I lay my head to rest looks more and more irresistible but that becomes a flame to the fire. My eyes close and depart from the comfort zone that took all day to create. I'm already becoming consumed with the thoughts that keep me awake at night. Thoughts of a house, car, job, wife, children, mortgage, insurance, friends, and God fuel the engine. I think to myself. and wake up.

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