Saturday, April 9, 2011

First

I'm not a man that deals well with a first. The first time I flew time stood still while my stomach felt the need to create art through the expression of my last meal. My expectation of pain before my first tattoo sent my body into hyper-drive. Twenty minutes under the gun and those expectations were flushed out. They fashioned a new whiter version of me. The tattoo artist generously gave me a soda to increase my bodies sugar levels. Seriously, who needs a soda just to get a simple tattoo?

Recently I've encountered a new first that has overshadowed my first of the past. I allowed myself to get comfortable in the world created by a Christian education institution. Let me explain this. I gratuated from Lincoln Christian University almost two years ago this coming summer. This was a place that filled my plate spiritually and challenged my critical thinking while keeping me safely stacked away inside a Christian community. Now for the first time I'm realizing the challenge of continued growth through self-education. School provided substance for life and it came without a great effort on my behalf. I was provided with knowledge, not necessarily seeking that knowledge without assistance. This is both exciting and terrifying at the same time. For months I really did not know how to react to this new conundrum but through reflection and blessed experiences I've come to a conclusion on my new first that will hopefully make this experiences outcome a little better than my previous stories.

God placed me in a structured learning environment to prepare me for the unstructured classroom found in what we call life. This classroom is filled with insurmountable knowledge in a variety of places. If you look close enough you can see God teaching in all things at all times. The faces of the professors are different now. They come in different shapes and sizes. Lessons are being prepared by co-workers, friends, fiances, and children. I think i misspoke when I said that I've entered a non-structured classroom. It's still structured but in a different way. School was structured by man but life is structured by the creator.

I remember the first time I rode a bike on two wheels. I left the dinner table went outside and started riding. In the beginning I struggled but through discipline i grew in my ability to just go. God has already provided my means of new education. It's up to me to trust and just go.